Bart asked below if I ever heard from Lionel (LEE-oh-nel, for all you Americans) again, the European ex-boyfriend, and since I got a couple emails with the same question, I thought I’d just tell ya’ll about it:

We email or write every couple months, and he called last week on the two-year anniversary of his leaving. I think about him all the time, and what life might have been like. Lio and I had an absurdly instant, almost electrical connection—something I didn’t believe in until I experienced it. It was intellectual but passionate, intense but light-hearted, all at the same time. It’s hard to explain, but those of you who’ve had a relationship like that know what I mean. I kind of don’t think I’ll ever have that connection with anyone else.

Anyway, Lio always asks if I “want to come stay awhile” in Florence or Biel/Bienne (he’s half Swiss, half Italian… and all hottie), but there aren’t really a lot of employment options for an American TV guy. Sometimes I think I should do it, just to see, but I’d be leaving way too much behind: friends, work, and of course, Patrick. I can’t justify losing an established, wonderful, long-term relationship with Patrick for the chance that, after two years, Lio and I could have the “magical” relationship we had before.

Do I have that same magic with Patrick? Of course not—they’re two very different people. But we have something just as great, in a different way, and I’m really happy with it.

I would like to visit Lio one day, especially since I’m long overdue for another trip to Europe, but I’m not sure how Patrick would react to that. Lio always says to bring Patrick too, but I think that would be a little too weird for me:

“Patrick, this is Lionel, the man I loved before you, who was heartlessly taken from me by our government, while I was left crying at the airport.”

Yeah, right. I really don’t need that gay soap opera in my life. That’s what my friends are for.