For an explanation about Geoffrey, click here.

Mon. 11 Feb 1991

I feel so relieved that the “moving sale” is over. The trick is not thinking about what happened. If you try to laught at things, maybe you won’t have time to cry about them. I’d be truly happy if I had my health left. This is the final chapter of my life. It would be so nice to have a future to look forward to. It’s so hard to relate to others who have “everyday” problems and let them tear their lives apart. If you can live through things, how bad can they be?

Luis picked me up this morning to go to Salt Lake to look for my place to live. I liked the first place we looked at and made application for it. I was very surprised that the manager asked all sorts of qualifying questions while she showed it to us. It never occurred to me that most people wouldn’t want me for a tenant. I finally lied on the application - adding $500 worth of income claiming I worked for Luis part time. I really hope that I get to move into the place. It seems perfect for my needs.

It’s really hard to leave my remaining things in the house since I haven’t made a payment. Luis and Ray seem to think that I shouldn’t be worried about things. I wish I could take their advice to heart. I don’t think they realize how important that house was to me. I came so close to having exactly what I wanted out of life. How quickly things fall apart. Now, I can only hope that I can keep together what little is left to me. What will I do if I don’t get this apartment? No one knows how much I look forward to getting settled.