Though I remember hearing about this when it launched, I hadn’t heard anything about it for months and assumed it had died or gone the way of Friendster or whatever. But last night Patrick sent me the Connexion page of a friend of ours and I took a minute to look around at the Salt Lake City profiles.
And boy was I surprised. Almost every gay boy I know has a profile. Nearly 1,000 of them in the Salt Lake area. The scary thing is that Connexion proves what I’ve said for years: gay Salt Lake is abundantly incestuous. But isn’t every city’s gay community?
Despite being “in the top 6% of cities where gay and lesbian couples [are] likely to live,” Salt Lake is still like a small town in a lot of ways, both good and bad. If you’re active in the Wasatch Front gay community in any way, be it professionally, volunteer work, or just going to the bars or hooking up online, I’ll bet you’re two degrees away, at most, from anybody else in town who’s out at all. No wonder STDs (namely HIV and syphillis) have a heydey here. Half the high-risk population is closeted because of the church (and therefore won’t acknowledge their risk and risk behaviors) and the other half has slept with everybody who isn’t closeted.
It’s just one of those days where I’m ready for us to move someplace else, someplace bigger where we don’t know anybody. I don’t know why I feel like that today, either; I had a good day. I think I’m tired of fitting into the same place I always have within the gay community. People recognize me for specific reasons and as a certain kind of person, and that’s not going to change anytime soon. It’s been the same since I was 17. I’ve been doing the same things since I was 17. Maybe it’s time to expand my horizons a little, do some different things in life, eh? Really, I know it’s not because of Salt Lake. It’d eventually be the same any place else, no matter the size.
And no, I do not have a profile at connexion.org. Or anyplace else for that matter. For now at least, Zionide will more than suffice as my only online “publicity.”
Not that anybody local reads anyway. My stats rarely indicate a Utah visitor. Which, really, I kind of prefer. I like being without the potential drama of all these Utah gay boys reading. I’m satisfied just being one of the “real” world’s primary blog connections to Zion.
Yep - that’s right. Primary. Me and Dooce. Uh-huh. For sure. And don’t you forget it. 
July 8, 2005 at 5:47 am
Hey if your bored with Utah, I know where some jobs you like are open!?!?!? hint hint
July 8, 2005 at 9:27 am
Like you, I’ve discovered that, once you’re involved within the community for a significant period of time (or just regularly frequent certain places), you get a “rep”. I used to volunteer for an Asian group out here and though I’ve been out of it since the late ‘90s, people still recognize me at festivals.
July 8, 2005 at 12:08 pm
I know we kind of dog it sometimes, but Charlotte NC is actually a nice place to live. Everyone that is moving here seems to think so. We are almost 600,000 people now! It’s an awesome pivot point for Atlanta, DC, beach, or mountain travel too.
July 8, 2005 at 12:52 pm
So I guess that means I’m secondary at best? Fuck you, bitch!
–The Boyfriend
July 8, 2005 at 3:10 pm
Move to sunny Dallas and live amongst the starrrrrs!
And you do have a Friendster profile, though it’s basically blank and says you haven’t logged in a really long time.
July 9, 2005 at 6:08 am
No, forget Dallas and NC, come to Britain, queens everywhere, you’ll love it, dohlink!
July 9, 2005 at 12:27 pm
nicholae,
do you need a hug? sorry about conexxion.. sorry im listed there too
i feel so disconnected to the community but i like seeing who else is gay in this city.. in fact.. ive started noticing people at my work that i have seen on the big c.. i also not like feeling like the big lonely homo in the valley.. however.. i hear you and it is a little spooky to some degree.. reminds me of jr high a little bit.
miss you
July 9, 2005 at 10:30 pm
I have been reading a bunch or your archives and now i keep checking in cause I like what you write- plus i am a voyeur and abviously you are an exhibitionist! Anywho- moving can be a good thing- but at the same time having a support network is good too (i mean if you left how else could you conspire secret parties for your Boyfriend with his mother?)
And as for mentioning Dooce- thanks you led me to her blogg and i am much appreciative of that!
November 29, 2005 at 2:14 pm
Just got sent the link to your site and wanted to say hi. I’m an ex-Utah, gay ex-Mormon or whatever. I’m wonder how we’re connected.